Back At Work

My twins are 9 weeks old today and I have been back to work for a week and a half or so. Before I had the babies I knew I was returning to work for many different reasons. First, I LOVE my job. I work at a university in the Dallas area and do health education for college students. Both my bachelor's and master's degrees are in health education and I have worked in this field for over 6 years. It goes without saying that I found my niche. Also, My husband is self-employed, so health insurance for all 4 of us comes from me (HUGE benefit from my job). Financially it makes sense as well. The more money we are bringing in, the better off our children will be in the future. If I didn't work, saving for college wouldn't be a possibility right now. So, all in all, me going back to work was the best logistical decision for us.

I have always known that I wanted to continue working, but I don't want people to think that this was an easy decision for me to make. While I knew this was going to be the best decision for our family, I couldn't imagine not being with my kids everyday after I had them. I quickly realized that I wouldn't be there every time they cried to comfort them. I wouldn't be there for every feeding to make sure they ate enough or that they burped well (LG has acid re-flux and LB is very cranky if he doesn't burp well). I honestly thought that they were too young to remember who I was and would bond with who ever was caring for them daily.

Now that we have had a routine for a few weeks or so, I feel so much better about my decision. Not only did it logistically make sense, but it made sense for me as an individual and for my children. I want them to be as independent as possible. I know many children who have gone to daycare from a very early age and I am always impressed with how well adjusted they are. I know that this is not solely based on going to daycare, but I liked the fact that my children would always have a place to learn and that they would have to rely on someone other than my self or their dad for help. Let's face it, in the real world parents can't be with their children all the time and I want my kids to know that they can do things without us (even if it breaks my heart to think that someday they wont need me).

Let me give you a glimpse into my first day back at work:

- I woke up around 5:45am and got myself ready. I prepped our bags and everything they would need for the day the night before so I really only had to brush my teeth, wash my face and fix my hair (I shower at night).
- After I was ready (except for my shirt. I put that on last because you can imagine what would happen to it if I fed them with it on) and fed the babies at 6:30 while watching the news.
- After they ate I let them sit up for a little in a boppy to help their bellies settle and got my coffee and lunch together. I make my lunch the night before as well and throw it in a bag in the morning.
- Then I change the babies and put on their outfits.
-Next, getting everyone/everything to the car. It is physically very difficult to get the babies and all of our crap to the car by myself. So, the night before I put my gym bag (I workout at lunch time) in the car so I have one less thing to load.  I pull the car out of the garage and load all of our bags, my coffee, etc. I keep the car running with it locked so it stays cool and go inside to put the babies in their car seats. This is always a challenge. They hate their car seats and cry every time we put them in there. After I load them in the car, we are pulling out of the driveway by 7:10am.
- I take them into daycare and get all of their stuff in order and say my goodbyes and am in my car by 7:30am, at work by 8am.

Yes I cried on the way to daycare and when we went inside and when I was talking with the teacher and when I finally walked back to my car. By the time I was halfway to work I was thinking about my job and my-coworkers and I felt much better. I haven't cried dropping them off since. I have been so busy at work and I know my babies are well taken care of that I don't have sad emotions about it anymore.

You may be wondering where S is during all of this morning shuffle. Right now he is in charge of the 11:30pm feeding and is in bed by 12:30-1am every night. I go to bed around 9:30pm and am in charge of the 6:30am feeding and the middle of the night feeding if there is one. This way, we both get a good solid block of sleep. Plus, he can get up later because he works from home and doesn't have to be somewhere at 8am every morning.

Not being with the babies everyday is not easy, but it is working for us. I know I am missing some cuteness and cuddles, but I definitely get them when I get home. They know I am Mommy and smile every time I walk in the door and that is the best feeling in the world. I have to say that I am very happy being a working Mom. I am a better mother when I am with them and a better wife to my husband. I look at it this way, I get to do two jobs that I love and these two babies to cuddle every day!